Losing Serene Sinclair was the best thing that happened to Red & Ice — at least that’s what Nolan Stone’s manager, Ramona, kept saying.
“You’re the star of this duo, anyway,” she said after finding out Serene had gone AWOL. “Serene’s talented and gorgeous, but she’s not for this industry. You, on the other hand—” Ramona eyed him from head-to-toe, then back. “How far are you willing to go to succeed at this, Stone?”
Desperate for something — anything — to distract him from Serene’s absence, Nolan could only shrug in response. “How far do you want me to go?”
Ramona grinned. “Just you wait, Nolan Stone. Work hard at this, do what I tell you to do, and I promise you: you’ll become a world-famous star.”
From that point on, everything happened in lightning speed, and in it all, Ramona proved herself to be no liar. Within a few weeks of Serene leaving their tour and dumping Nolan, Ramona spun the entire thing to emphasize how Serene, his childhood sweetheart and former partner, had deeply wronged Nolan by leaving.
The broken-hearted rock star gave Ramona’s PR Team an amazing angle to work with. By the strength of that premise alone, in a matter of days, Ramona secured a contract for a reality show on a major TV network: The New Red. They designed the show to capitalize on Nolan’s broken heart, his qualms about faith, church culture, and Christianity, and his search for a girl able to replace Serene’s spot in their musical duo, Red & Ice, perhaps even in his heart.
In a span of three weeks, they traveled from state to state, auditioning redheads, until they found Diana Rake in a small town in the middle of nowhere. She joined a group of twelve women hand-picked by Nolan — or at least that’s what the network wanted the audience to believe. They shot the TV show soon after. Only months after Serene left Red & Ice, the network aired The New Red. The audience voted who they thought “The New Red” should be.
Nolan had held no doubt from the beginning Diana would win. In fact, they had conditioned the show to favor her. He and she started writing songs together even before the show aired.
Then came the evening when finally, the rest of the world would know: Red & Ice had found a new Red. The question on everyone’s minds was whether Nolan Stone had found his new Red as well. The smile he pasted on his face as he stood backstage waiting to be presented by the TV show’s host would convince the world he had moved on. He would use all the charisma and confidence he could muster to make sure of that, but Diana Rake — beautiful and talented as she was — could never be Serene Sinclair.
“Ladies and gentlemen, on their grand debut as the all-new and improved Red & Ice, Nolan Stone and Diana Rake!”
The audience’s applause exploded across the studio as Nolan and Diana walked to the center of the stage. The main lights dimmed, allowing LEDs and neons to create an atmosphere accentuating the music.
“Break a leg.” Nolan grinned at Diana as he picked up his electric guitar, Magenta, the same Les Paul Serene had given him the same day she had rejected his wedding proposal.
“Be careful what you wish for, rock star.” She smirked as she took her place behind the drum set. “You don’t want me outshining you.”
Nolan chuckled. “Arrogance.” He strummed the first chord and positioned his mouth in front of the microphone.
Diana hit the cymbals.
Nolan sang the first song they had composed together: Broken Thunder.
The studio audience drank in every minute of the performance. The animated expressions on their faces as they responded to what Nolan and Diana were giving energized him in a way nothing else could. From the audience reaction alone, there was no questioning what a hit the new Red & Ice was. Their fans adored the new Red to Nolan’s Ice. How could they not? They had voted for her. With the veiled manipulations of Nolan’s label, they had chosen Diana to be their New Red.
The cascade of wild, red curls on Diana’s head bounced and flew as she skillfully played the drums. Nolan drew a breath at how hot she looked. As he belted out his final note, he winked at her. She blushed.
His fingers skillfully maneuvered the strings of his guitar to arrive at a thunderous climax while Diana’s cymbals gave the music the support it needed. There was no denying it. She was a lot better at this than Serene ever was, yet deep inside, despite how amazing the new Red was, Nolan couldn’t stop pining for the old Red. The show made for a frenzied distraction from that painful reality.
The wild applause — the love coming from all these strangers — rocked Nolan into wave upon wave of exhilarated bliss as he gestured toward his new partner. Diana quickly made her way to him, stood by his side, and held his hand. They both bowed.
The part Nolan dreaded most followed.
The winding down.
Music always faded away into the silence, leaving Nolan behind, depleted and grappling with the aftermath. His jaw tightened as Diana squeezed his hand. Nolan let go of her and used the back of one hand to wipe the sweat from his brow, while he laid the other hand on the small of her back so they could take a seat on the couches at the center of the TV studio.
The show’s host interviewed them after a short break, allowing them to recuperate after performing in front of a live studio audience.
“Your chemistry is off-the-charts!” The host took on this delighted expression on his face the moment the show came back on. “I mean, we all saw that in the show, but seeing you together in person, whew!” He fanned his face with his hand.
Nolan and Diana exchanged glances and laughed.
“It’s him,” Diana said. “Nolan is such a talented artist. He makes everything seem so easy, and with him, it is. Or at least it’s a lot easier. He lightens everyone’s load just by being himself.”
“Play up the flirting, Nolan. She’s giving you a lot to work with. Reciprocate.” Ramona’s voice in his ear piece almost made him jolt out of the couch.
Nolan cleared his throat and tried not to show discomfort on national TV. “Diana is being incredibly kind. She’s a professional through and through, but she’s more than that. Other than being talented, she’s an amazing human being. I’m privileged to work with her.”
“Doesn’t hurt that she also looks the part, does it?” the host asked.
“That goes without saying. She’s beautiful.” Nolan addressed the audience. “Don’t you think she’s beautiful?!”
The audience yelled and applauded to signal their agreement.
The rest of the interview went on without a hitch, but not without Ramona’s voice instructing both what to do.
By the time Nolan walked off stage, he wasn’t even sure if Diana was into him or if the young progeny was like him: just following Ramona’s instructions.
Nolan returned to the dressing room reserved for him and was about to get changed when Diana burst inside his room.
“I’m sorry,” she said. “I know this is inappropriate, but Nolan, you can’t keep leading me on like this. In the show and out of it, I’ve made it clear over and over again how into you I am. Why aren’t we together?”
Before he could say anything, she marched up to him, threw her hands around him, and kissed him full on the mouth.
She awakened all his senses physically. His pulse raced. His mind whirled. But all it took was one glimpse of his guitar to remember Serene, and everything halted.
He pulled away from Diana.
She gasped.
Nolan shook his head. “I’m sorry. I’m still not over her. You don’t deserve to be some rebound.”
“I can help you forget her,” she said as she sauntered toward him.
“That’s just the thing, Diana. I’m not sure I want to forget.”
She stopped her approach and narrowed her eyes at him. “All right then. I’ll give you time, but trust me when I say this isn’t over. You’ll see, rock star. We’re perfect for each other.”
Nolan’s lips curled. He could tell how easy it was to get her to do anything he asked. All he needed to do was play along and take what she was already offering. Still, somehow, he couldn’t bring himself to act on his desires. He reasoned to himself that it was because of Serene, but when he laid his head to rest that night, he felt an intangible tug in his heart. What if it wasn’t Serene? What if it was all those years of going to Sunday School and attending youth group and leading worship? What if it was God?
Whatever the reason, one thing Nolan knew to be true was that the world might have found a new Red, but he certainly hadn’t. For a long time, it seemed to him that Serene would forever be the only Red in his life.
Until one day, he realized that he might no longer be the only Ice in hers.
– three months later –
Nolan gripped the steering wheel as he drove to his old neighborhood to celebrate Christmas with his family. It felt like a lifetime ago since the first time they had driven through these streets, with Nova shrinking in shame because of how their clunky, old car, Neutron, kept backfiring.
This time, Nolan arrived in a state-of-the-art, luxury Hummer and a stunning rock star in the passenger seat.
Diana wrinkled her nose. “You live here?”
“Hey. Don’t judge. Your hometown was no better.”
“Let’s leave the past behind us, shall we?”
“Unfortunately for me, I can’t quite do that, because Ma is stuck in the past. No matter how much I promise her a better house in a more upscale neighborhood, she insists this is her home. I can’t make her leave.”
“Do you think she’ll like me?”
Nolan smirked as he threw a glance at her revealing midriff and ripped jeans. “Dressed that way? She’ll hate you. My mother’s name is Clara. We have this culture in the Philippines called Maria Clara. It’s all about being demure and conservative, about playing hard-to-get. Diana, you’re the exact opposite of that.”
“Then why would you bring me here? Your older sister doesn’t like me either.”
“What? Nova likes you just fine.”
“Oh please. Remember when she and her husband attended our concert? Both were so judgey.”
“Not true. Nova even complimented your looks and your talent.”
“Shade. All that was just shade. I know girls. Your sister hates me.”
“Oh, come on. You’re so cynical.” Nolan pulled over in their familiar driveway. He grinned at the open garage where he still found Neutron parked inside. Waves of nostalgia crashed over him.
“What have I gotten myself into?” Diana scowled. “And what is that?”
“That’s our old car, Neutron.”
“Is it like a thing in your family? Naming inanimate objects? Your guitar is Magenta, and this new SUV is Demi…”
“It’s Ma. She named almost everything when we were growing up. I picked it up. Speaking of my mother—”
Clara Stone tucked a strand of her wavy, dark hair behind her ear as she rushed out of the front door and jogged down the porch steps. Nolan got out of the Hummer to hug his mother, twirling her around the small path crossing their front yard.
“Son!” she exclaimed.
“Ma!”
“You look so handsome! Gwapo.”
“That’s because you’re still so maganda, Ma. Have you been taking good care of yourself?”
“I try, iho. I get a lot of help from our church, you know. Especially the Sinclairs next door. And who is this lovely young woman?”
“You remember Diana?”
“The name suits you, iha. I wish you’d put more clothes on though. Why are you dressed this way? Come inside. We don’t want you catching a cold.”
Nolan dragged himself behind them. As much as he tried to keep himself from doing so, he glanced at the house next door. Was she there?
“Are you looking for Serene?”
Nolan turned around to find his older sister, Nova, getting out of a black family van. He tilted his head to the side and smiled. “If it isn’t Super Nova herself.” He spread his arms to coax her into a hug. “You’re huge!”
She obliged and wrapped her arms around his waist. Or at least tried to. The large bump on her stomach made it difficult to hug him. “That’s an awful thing to say to a pregnant woman.”
“I know, but seriously, Nova. You look amazing for someone who has two humans inside her.”
She blushed.
“I agree,” her husband, Caleb, said as he approached.
“You must be so excited to meet your twins.” Nolan shook his brother-in-law’s hand. “I know I am. Can’t wait to be their cool rock star uncle and spoil them rotten.”
“I wouldn’t call you cool, but—” Nova’s words drifted into the crisp air.
“Hey, Nolan.”
Shivers climbed from the base of his spine to the nape of his neck. He turned around and sure enough, there she was. Serene Sinclair. The love of his life. At least she used to be. He drew his breath at the familiar, yet foreign, sight of her — the freckles on her cheeks, her green eyes, and pink lips.
“You cut your hair,” he said, noticing the straight, shoulder-length layers. “I’ve never seen it like that. It looks good on you.”
“I thought I’d try something new.” She shrugged. “How are you?”
“Serene!” a male voice disrupted the exchange before Nolan could respond.
A lanky guy with tousled brown hair, black-rimmed glasses, and a lopsided grin ran from the Sinclairs’ front porch to Serene. “Your dad’s looking for—” He noticed the company she was with. “Oh. Hey. I’m Drew.” His eyes widened at the sight of Nolan. “I can’t believe it. You’re Nolan Stone! Big fan.”
Serene shot a glance at him. A twisted smile appeared on her lips. “You’re a fan?”
“I am! I have been from the moment that first viral video of Rocking Serene appeared online.” His hand ran the length of her spine and stopped at the small of her back.
Nolan flinched.
Serene’s eyes flickered as she bit her lip. “Drew and I are great friends. He’s my agent.”
Nolan’s brow quirked up. “Your agent?”
“He drove all the way here to see my art.”
“She’s incredibly talented,” Drew said.
Nolan’s stomach turned. “Talented enough for you to drive to see her during the holidays?” He couldn’t mask the edge from his voice.
“My family isn’t big on celebrating Christmas,” Drew explained.
“Christmas is a huge deal to the Filipino side of our family,” Nova interrupted. She passed Nolan to embrace Serene. “Girl, you look lovely.”
“Nova! You’re so… pregnant!”
The rest of the conversation went over Nolan’s head. All he could focus on was this man whose hand kept finding Serene’s back, and she didn’t seem to be the slightest bit bothered by his touch.
Only when Diana showed up, wearing a cardigan to cover herself up, and linked her arms with his did he snap out of his building ire.
“Who are your friends, Nolan?” she asked before fixing her eyes on Nolan’s ex. “You must be Serene. I’m the new Red.”
Nova’s face scrunched up in disgust, but Diana didn’t seem fazed by it at all. Her smile was wide and her gaze dead set on Serene. A twisted part of Nolan found delight in the way Serene’s face fell at the sight of Diana. It was for only a moment. Just a flicker.
Proving to still be the classy human being she had always been, Serene recovered and smiled back at Diana. “You’re even more beautiful in person. It’s nice to meet you.” She extended her hand to Diana, who stared at it for a second.
She glanced at Nolan. “Your mother is asking why you’re still not inside.”
Nolan didn’t know what possessed him to do it, but he placed his arm over Diana’s shoulder and pulled her close. He kissed her on the temple and then turned to the woman whose presence still managed to make his heart miss several beats. “I have to go. It was nice to see you again, Serene.”
He ignored how his older sister harrumphed at him as she planted a hand on her waist. He walked back to the house with Diana wrapped in his arms, her body pressed against his. The moment masked his jealousy and hurt with a false sense of triumph that lasted only until his head hit the pillow that night. He wondered if Drew could be more than just a friend to Serene. Did he hurt her by pretending to be with Diana as much as she had hurt him when she had abandoned him? Why was it that no matter how much he had tried to get over Serene, he still wasn’t over her?
Nolan didn’t think it through. All he wanted was to stop hurting, and the only way he knew to do that was to knock on the guest room’s door and take advantage of what Diana had been offering since he met her.
Forget this Maria Clara nonsense, he thought as he sank into Diana’s bed. I’ll do whatever it takes to get over Serene.
What bothered Serene more? That Nolan’s arm had been around Diana or that Drew had known her as the original Red and had never once mentioned it?
“Are you two sure you don’t need any help?” Mama Aida lingered by the table as Serene and Drew cleaned up.
“Mama, you didn’t let us help with preparing dinner. The least you can do is allow us to clean up.” Serene stomped her foot on the hardwood floor to emphasize that she wasn’t changing her mind. “Join Dad and Jeremy. Watch that movie with them.”
“Okay then.” Mama Aida sighed with resignation. “Thank you.”
The moment Mama Aida left, Serene tensed. She focused on cleaning up and tried her best to avoid eye contact with the friend she had been trying to ignore.
“Serene? Is something wrong?” Drew asked.
“Hmm?” Serene stacked the dinner plates on the table. “Why would you think that?”
“Well, you haven’t spoken to me or looked me in the eye since we bumped into Nolan Stone.” He froze. “I still can’t wrap my mind around the fact he still lives next door to you. He’s freaking Nolan Stone!”
Serene winced and dropped the forks onto the pile of plates. Its clang made him jolt. “His mom lives next door to my parents. Nolan most likely lives in some mansion somewhere. Did you know?”
“Know what? Where he lives?”
“No. Did you know I used to be Red? Is that why you agreed to check out my art? Because I was once Red from Red & Ice?”
Drew stopped moving. He took a deep breath before he stacked glasses. “Of course I knew. You and Nolan were online sensations. Serene,” he said, “I loved the original videos that shot you both to fame. I never understood why you broke up with him and quit the gig, but—” he shrugged “—it happens. Fairly typical for show business. I was aware of all of that, but I’m here because I love your work. That is why I came. Not because of Red & Ice. I never mentioned it before, because your public break-up didn’t seem like something we needed to discuss.”
“My actual break-up with him wasn’t public.” She shook her head. Flashes of Nolan turning his back on her at the church parking lot revisited her. “He turned it public with that reality show.” Serene got choked up. “I can’t believe talking about this is still getting to me. I’m so over him!”
Drew flinched. “Are you?”
“I hope I am.”
“Doesn’t look like it. You should have seen your face — crestfallen and all — when you saw him walk away with Diana. I don’t think they’re together, by the way. I would even wager he was deliberately trying to make you jealous.”
Serene creased her brows and raised her eyes to meet Drew’s. “Never pegged you to be such a fanboy.”
“I hide it well, but I was pretty stoked when I first met you. Celebrity and all, but—” he shrugged “—meh. You’re not that special.” He chuckled.
“Hey.” Serene deadpanned. She carried the plates and utensils to the dishwasher.
“For all it’s worth, you had so much more chemistry with him than Diana.”
“We were quite in love back then.”
“Not anymore?”
Serene sighed. “Achieving his dream changed him. He’s no longer the boy I fell head-over-heels in love with, but it still hurts to see him, so I guess I’m not as over him as I want to be. But in love? No. Not anymore.”
“If you say so.” Drew helped her load the dishwasher in silence.
Once they finished, he nudged her on the shoulder. “We’re good, right? You’ll still help convince Laila to go on a date with me?”
Serene rolled her eyes. “Yeah. We’re good.”
“Great then.”
Serene sighed. “Want to go watch that movie with the family?”
“Yes, please.”
The rest of the night went by as any normal night at the Sinclair residence would. After the pleasant family evening, Serene expected to go to bed and sleep in peace. However, just as her eyes drooped and her consciousness gave way to dreams, a tap on her bedroom window woke her up.
Tap.
She furrowed her brows.
Tap. Tap.
Was someone knocking on her window? She got out of bed and dragged her feet to the window. She opened it and gasped when a stone flew less than an inch past her ear.
“Oops. Sorrryyy…” Nolan drawled. He snickered before stumbling on the grass of their front lawn. “Didn’t mean to hit you with a stone. Well, almost.” He snickered again, then something akin to fury sharpened his gaze. “Why did you open your window so suddenly? You should have warned me or something.”
“Nolan.” Serene hissed. “What are you doing here? Are you drunk?”
“What if I am?” He made a face. “Is that Drew guy your new boyfriend? It’s not good to lie.”
“I told you, Nolan. He isn’t. Can we discuss this some other time? I don’t want to wake my parents up.”
“Come down here then so I don’t have to yell.”
“No.”
“Serene! Come down! Pleeease. You have to.”
Serene flinched. “Fine, fine.” Had it been anyone other than Nolan, she never would have descended the stairs and stepped into the front lawn, but this was Nolan. Her best friend. Her childhood sweetheart. She had no reason to assume he would ever do anything to hurt her. She was wrong.
The moment she was within reach, Nolan grabbed her arm and pulled her close. Focused on her face, he spoke. “Swear you’re not with him.”
She winced at the stench of alcohol on his breath. “Why would it even matter to you if I am?”
“Because I always thought we would be together, Serene. Not you and him.” He hiccuped. “But you left, and you broke my heart, Red. You shattered my heart.”
She tried to fight back the tears, but they came anyway. “I’m sorry.”
“You should be, because if you hadn’t left, maybe I wouldn’t be such a sinner now, and I wouldn’t have to go to hell or something.”
“Nolan.” Serene blew out some air. “I have no clue what you’re talking about. I’ve hurt you. That is something I can admit and apologize to you for. I’m sorry for the way I handled everything, but you can’t blame me for the choices you make. Whatever you did, that’s not on me.”
“I slept with Diana. I saw you with Drew, and it hurt so bad, I slept with Diana.” His eyes cleared and a wry chuckle escaped his lips. “It felt good and horrible at the same time. That’s the problem with growing up in church. It’s like the Bible is hard-wired into your brain. It’s true what we kept saying back then: the Word does not return void. Ha!” He threw his arms in the air, stumbled backwards, and fell on the ground. A string of colorful cussing followed.
Serene stared at his limp form slouched over on the grass. He tried to get up but fell back down. The weight of his confession fell on her chest. She wiped away her tears but more came. How had it come to this? “Nolan, please go home.”
“You don’t even care, do you? You don’t care that I’m going to hell.”
“Nolan, you know as well as I do how to return to God. The choice is yours to make. If your goal was to hurt me tonight, then consider it done. You broke my heart too, Nolan Stone, and you’ll keep breaking it as long as you keep going on this path. I’ll be praying for you, but I can’t return to you just to—”
He cussed to interrupt her. “You really are something, Serene. A bit full of yourself, don’t you think? What on earth gave you the idea I would ever want you back?”
Serene stepped back and swallowed hard. She nodded and wiped her tears away. “Okay. Point taken. Just please go.”
He tried to stand up but failed at it. Afraid that her parents might wake up to see him passed out on their front lawn, Serene helped him up and dragged him to his mother’s house next door. When she was about to knock to wake someone up, he stopped her.
“Don’t,” he said. “I don’t want Ma to see me this way.”
Serene nodded and helped him sit on a bench on their porch. “Will you be able to hold yourself up?”
He grunted in response.
She straightened. “Goodbye, Nolan. I am sorry for the pain I’ve caused you.”
“I hope you get hurt the same way you hurt me, Serene.”
All she could do was force a smile before she walked away. Only when she reached her bedroom did she realize she was no longer crying. She got on her knees beside her bed and whispered a prayer to God. “I surrender him and all the hurt I feel to You. Help me love You more than I ever loved him.”
Serene never spoke to anyone about that night, but it was one of the most memorable nights of her life, because before she drifted from wakefulness to dreams, assurance came over her. For the first time in a long time, she had confidence that she loved God more than she loved Nolan Stone.
This is the first chapter of the Christian love story, The One Who Rocked Away.